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”I said, “No shit?”God Bless CanadaThis one is compliments of neubergerHere is one that should come with a warning to not drink or eat while reading.“As a joke, my brother Jay used to hang a pair of panty hose over his
fireplace before Christmas. He said all he wanted was for Santa to fill
them.
What they say about Santa checking the list twice must be true because every Christmas morning, although Jay’s kids’ stockings overflowed, his poor pantyhose hung sadly empty.One year I decided to make his dream come true. I put on sunglasses and
went in search of an inflatable love doll. They don’t sell those things at
Wal-Mart. I had to go to an adult bookstore downtown.
If you’ve never been in an X-rated store, don’t go, you’ll only confuse yourself. I was there an hour saying things like, ‘What does this do?’
’ You’re kidding me!’ ‘Who would buy that?’ Finally, I made it to the inflatable doll section.
I wanted to buy a standard, uncomplicated doll that could also substitute
as a. "Ok, ok. I'm sorry Gabby."I leaned over and put my arms around him. He smelled like Irish Spring soap. I held him tight against me and felt his strong arms wrap around me like a blanket."Will you come visit me when you can?" I asked in a muffled voice."I will." I love you," I said. It felt different when I told him at that time. Being a child I didn't understand why it felt different. It just did."I love you too. Love you so much," he rasped and leaned back to kiss my cheek. His lips left a slight wetness on my skin. Most people would have the tendency to wipe it off but I loved how it stayed on my skin and slowly dissolved."Ok, well I'll see you around Gabby," he said and stood back up. I looked up at him and he stroked my hair."Ok. Bye Uncle Anthony," I said in a barely audible voice.He walked out of the bathroom and looked back and winked at me. Then he went off to start his own life.~Four Years Later~"Aww look at the pretty birthday girl! Doesn't she look divine?" My mother.
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