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Mr. Rampton’s appearance -- my height if I scrunched over, hair in need of a barber, usually the same sports coat -- might have explained him being single. Not gay or anything, as we know by how a guy talks to us. Mr. Rampton was actually funny sometimes, but most missed it. He was quiet, for a teacher at least, but then again, some of us were quiet for students.Part of why we liked Mr. Rampton -- and probably why he wasn’t hitched -- was his penchant for strange things, which to us made him not strange at all. We’d go down the halls humming, “When You’re Strange” by the Doors -- they were this old band -- Mr. Rampton knew the words, too, but he wouldn’t sing in the hall.Mr. Rampton liked McDonald’s hamburgers, black and white movies and his VW Beetle that actually went put-put. Most teachers were more into barbecues, miniseries and motor homes.But Mr. Rampton’s greatest strangeness was ukulele jazz. I’d no idea until my folks went to some jazz place where saxophonist Ron somebody. But it will be all right, I promise you. “Mom it will not be alright and this is not a little mistake it is a huge mistake. Oh, I feel so bad about this I feel like killing myself.” “No baby no, don’t you say that Mike, don’t you even think about it. I tell you it was not your fault at all it was all mine, I should not have given in to the longing I saw in your eyes or the longings and passion I feel for you, I am the guilty one I should have controlled myself. I don’t blame you; you are young and hot blooded. “No mom, I am the one to blame I baited you. What kind of man tries to fuck his own mother? Not because you are so beautiful and so fucking sexy I have to fuck you. I was so wrong. I treated you like a whore, you don’t deserve that. Oh I really feel like dying or just falling through the floor and disappear.” “Mike, please stop all that talk of wanting to die, you’re scaring me. And I don’t want you to disappear either; I want you here with me. I love you so much baby, I.
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