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"Over here, guys!"I looked up and saw Trent Abbott and Eric Johnson walking up to our table."What the fuck?" I was shocked. "What are you guys doing here?"They pulled up chairs and sat down on either side of me. "It's a long weekend, and we decided to take a road trip," said Trent."Yeah," agreed Eric. "Got a call about a friend of ours got a proctology problem he needs help with. Dude's got his head stuck good and tight up his own ass." Huh?" The gist of this conversation was escaping me.Eric stared me down. "I said, dude's got his head stuck good and tight up his own ass." I heard you, I just don't know what you're talking about," I said defensively. It was unconvincing, even to me, and Eric didn't even give it that much credence."By the end of the night, baby, you gonna know," he said. He looked around. "What's a brother got to do to get a couple a mugs here? We're dry as a bone."Our waitress scurried over with two more empty mugs and set them down. She seemed a little. As I worked on the rest, I talked about what I was doing and why. I pulled the chicken out and said, “Now you can get rid of all your frustrations!” I showed her how to put the chicken between clear wrap and beat it flat. I said, “This flattens it to tenderize it and make it cook more quickly.” I looked over at the table and said, “Jack, dear, I have a project for you.” He nodded. “In the pantry, get three bags of rice. Put them in that baking dish and fill it with enough water to cover the bags. Put all of that into the microwave. I’ll start it later.”I started to cook the vegetables and chicken in my wok using fresh spices and some sauces that I like. I looked at them and said, “How hot do you like your food?”Becky and John said, “Hot!Pam and Jack said, “Fairly hot. Moderately hot.”“Okay. We’ll compromise.”I continued to cook and then pressed the timer button and set the microwave to run. I continued to stir-fry the mixture in the wok. “Jack, darling, get the red and yellow bowls.
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