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So as I left her house it was close to 4 in the morning and I would need to get showered, changed, and well rested for my date tomorrow. I woke up about noon, meaning I had to show and change, and get some cash from the ATM, so as I got back to my place it was about 4:30 so I called Sam about what time I should come get her to which she replied, Does 8 sound good, I wanted to see that new flick with Leo Decaprio. So as I waited for the clock to reach 8 I turned on my computer I went to my favorite porn site and jerked off, the girl looked fairly similar to Sam but I just couldnt get off because it just wasnt the same, I just couldnt find that spark I had the night before, so as I sat I longed to see her again, I had never met such a sensual woman, someone who could get as riled up as her. Has I drove up to her place I began to feel giddy, as I realized how much I just wanted to spend time with her. ———————————————— I never quite met a man like JT hes some one Ive always had a crush. I thought my nephew's christening was the following weekend. I was at the library late studying. The lies continued to flow.That day seven months ago I stared at Lauren's picture in the obituaries and relived our friendship. So many emotions came flooding back. I wondered how our affair had affected her. I never knew because I left Dayton as soon as possible. My background growing up in a strict religious family taught me I had committed a grievous sin. Homosexuality might be a feeling fallible, horrible, demented human beings lived with, but to act on it was acknowledging it and, therefore, saving me a place in Hell. All this, of course, I learned while attending the Riverside Christian Academy. I was constantly reminded of my weak nature. "It's the way all humans are created," so said Brother Thomas, one of my counselors. "Sometimes we all feel the need to do something against the wishes of God. Suppressing that need is what makes us better humans; acting on that need makes us.
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