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I did put in a full 8 yesterday. I hear people talking about their dreams and goals for the future and I can’t afford the pain of having any.When I wrote about being overwhelmed in the bank two chapters ago I didn’t mention that I was having full blown for lack of a better word dementia like symptoms. I knew why we were there but didn’t understand what was going on. I was arguing about what papers go into what envelope and other silly behaviour. At one point my wife laid her head down on the desk. I was an overgrown 5 year old. I knew what was going on and I couldn’t stop it. It was that day my wife said I could use CBD no matter what the doctors say. I still had some and it helps keep that shit in check.Why didn’t I mention it when I wrote about it then? It’s humiliating. Every time it happens it brings me one step closer to the nursing home. Thinking about it scares me. If I don’t write about it I don’t have to think about it. At the same time, I told you guys I would keep it real.. Then she said your maid told me to give u some medicine. I asked what medicine. She smiled and asked me can I come inside. I welcomed her. She went inside and took one small bowl from kitchen and went to my bedroom and told me to stay at drawing room only. I stayed there with surprise. After 5 min, she brought the bowl to me with full of breast milk. Wow. I was surprised and really got hard on too. She too noticed that and smiled at me. And told me to put 2 drops to my eyes in every 2 hrs and I will be fine. I was still in shock and shook my head.She then said to lie down on my bed so she can help u in put drops in my eyes as no one else there to help me for that. I lay down on bed and she came close to me. Wow her smell was awesome. She put 2 drops each in my eyes and then left. After she left I took d bowl and drink d milk fully. Wow I felt it’s too tasty. I went to bathroom and masturbated first time thinking about her.At around 1.30 again she knocked at my door. She came inside.
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