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We walked into the kitchen and my girlfriends all yelled."Surprise!" Cassie, Liz, Rose, Whitney, Brenda, and Samantha had decided to give me a late impromptu birthday party. I was really surprised to see Nicolette there. Each of the girls was taking a turn to hug me and almost shyly put a kiss on my cheek."Nicolette?" I asked as she came up to me."Apparently I have some kind of honorary status until they invite me to sign some document. I don't join things. Just so you know. And I don't like hugging and kissing. So just get over it. People touching me give me the creeps. That being said, Happy Birthday." She reached up and gave me that kind of cheek to cheek air kiss that Europeans do. The back door slammed."Surprise!" Jennifer and Courtney yelled."Are we too late?" Court asked."Happy birthday, Brian," Anna said as she came into the room. Of course, with Anna coming in, Mom and Dad were right there, but they were carrying a birthday cake with lit candles and everyone started singing. At the end she turned to me and asked, “Did I say that right?”I smiled. “Pretty much. By the end of this, we’re going to have to pretty it all up, but you got it right. We’re going to smoke a bunch of cigarettes through it, collect the tar, and measure it all.”“Going to prove I shouldn’t be smoking these things, huh?” he said with a grunt.“Daddy, it’s not like that!”“Yeah, it is, honey. That’s exactly what it is. Don’t worry about it. If somebody had done this forty years ago, maybe they wouldn’t be killing me now,” he replied.“Daddy?” she asked, suddenly fearful.He coughed and smiled. “Not just yet, baby, but one of these days. I’ve still got a few years left. Just don’t you grow up as stupid as your mother and me. You, neither, young man,” he said to me.“No thanks, sir. My father smokes L&Ms and I have no interest in it either,” I responded.He just nodded at that. “Just how many cigarettes are we talking about, anyway?”I looked a little sheepish at that. It was a big number. “Uh, I.
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