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" She wouldn't look at me, not even a glance. "I'm sorry for everything." Me too, Kate. Please go back with your friends and leave me alone now." Yes, ma'am." I took a deep breath and wiped away my tears as I left."Is she going to be OK?" Jules nodded at my mom."I hope so. Will you help me pack up the rest of my old room tomorrow?" I felt like a coward, but I couldn't face going over there alone."Sure. What are you going to bring over?" Jules seemed a little flustered."Books mostly, the last of my clothes. The rest is going to Goodwill."John was taking it all in quietly. "That's a big step. No going back." I know. It's a little scary, like stepping out on a tightrope without a safety net."I noticed Jules was breathing a little fast. "Are you OK?" Just fine!" she said a little too brightly.John gave me a penetrating look, as if I needed the reminder. With Mom shutting me out, I was dependant on Jules to have a place to live. I couldn't afford one by myself working part time and going. "Aww thank you sweetie. You've made my day." And it was true.I don't think I'd ever been complimented like that before.With that, the girl skipped off. I never worked out why this girl couldremember me as male but no one else seemed to.And so I settled in for the rest of the day. I just got used to having ahigh voice, being called "she," and naturally gravitating more to thegirls than the boys. It was fun. Everyone seemed to accept and like me.Every now and then I thought, "Whoah, I'm a girl and I don't have apenis," but it never actually bothered me as much as I thought it would.Later in the afternoon, two girls from my class came by. I barely knewthem, but knew their names were Talia and Sophie."Oh hi Paula," they said."Hi," I said back, wondering where this would lead."Wow, you look gorgeous in that dress!" said Talia. "How'd you get thisjob? It looks like all you do is wear a pretty dress and play with kids.Seems like a dream job." All I did was answer an ad," I said. "I've no.
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