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”“Wait, no. I-I just... I'm not sure what you mean. I've never had a boyfriend.”“But you're not a virgin.” I knew his tone well enough to know that this wasn't a question, nor was it a bitter accusation. Shaking my head, I met his eyes. “No, I'm not.”“How many?”“Six.” Most of the girls in the neighborhood would have numbers much higher than that, but I still felt ashamed at my own. If I had had my way, it would only be one, but the one I wanted was the one I would never have.Jack was shaking his head slightly. “It was six when I left.” Sex had fallen under the “tell each other everything” category of our friendship growing up. He knew the second I had sex for the first time. He knew how scared and reluctant I had been. He knew how much the guy pushed and pressured even though I barely knew him. He knew that halfway through I decided I didn't want to anymore, and he knew that the guy finished anyway. He did not, however, know anything when it came to that same guy showing up at school. Then, you will massage my feet and hands. Then tomorrow, guess who's going to dress me and comb my hair?'The wife replied, 'The fuckin' funeral director would be my first guess.'What children hear!!!!!A Sunday school teacher asked her class, "What was Jesus' mother's name?"One child answered, "Mary." The teacher then asked, "Who knows what Jesus' father's name was?" A little kid said, "Verge." Confused, the teacher asked, "Where did you get that?" The kid said, "Well, you know, they are always talking about Verge n' Mary.''- 3-year-old Reese: "Our Father, Who does art in heaven,Harold is His name. Amen."A little boy was overheard praying:"Lord, if you can't make me a better boy, don't worry about it. I'm having a real good time like I am."After the christening of his baby brother in church, Jason sobbed all the way home in the back seat of the car. His father asked him three times what was wrong. Finally, the boy replied, "That preacher said he wanted us brought up in a Christian.
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