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For the first time in as long as I can remember, I have something that's all mine, and my little secret is more energizing than a case of Jolt!Week 3I do not know why I should feel so guilty. When was the last time my husband paid attention to me like he should!There was no passion in my marriage anymore. We were both way too young to have been married. It seems we are almost roommates now, not lovers. Sometimes he is just so controlling, emotionally unavailable, a slob.That bastard is cheating, too – well I do not have any proof, but I damn well suspect that he is. I have seen how that little slutty receptionist looks at him. How he is always "bumping" into the divorcee across the street.I can come up with ten thousand different ways that what I am doing is a lot less worse than what he is doing.But why do I feel this is just a rationalization to excuse my actions? Am I just trying to convince myself?Week 8I really miss my friends. In the beginning, the totally exclusive, utterly. Unable to move, with no chance of getting free from this, she fought violently. Obviously the realization that something very, very bad was going to happen to her had finally hit. I decided to answer her previous question. My dear Lauren…you were in the wrong place at the worst possible time. Its nothing personal, I assure you. If you behave and be a good little whore, then you can walk out of here and go back to where you came. She paused in her struggle, weighing her options, Im sure. She could either endure whatever I did without a fight and live or she could resist and die. She remained still. Really? she whispered. I snickered meanly. No. Thats when the screaming started. I didnt have anybody near enough to hear them but too much sound annoyed me. I let her scream for a good minute, then struck her in the back of her skull hard enough to make her face bounch off the bark in front of her. She was silent after that, weeping softly. I was glad. I wasnt a big fan of beatings…I.
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