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She brought in a variety of lifesavers and said, “Children, I’d like you to close your eyes and taste these.”The kids easily identified the taste of cherries, lemons and mint, but when the teacher gave them honey-flavored lifesavers, all of the kids were stumped.“I’ll give you a hint,” said the teacher. “It’s something your mommy probably calls your daddy all the time.”Instantly, Little Johnny coughed his onto the floor and shouted, “Quick! Spit’em out! They’re assholes!”So Little Johnny’s teacher is warned at the beginning of the school year not to ever make a bet with Johnny unless she is absolutely sure she will win it.One day in class, Johnny raises his hand and says “teacher, I’ll bet you $50 I can guess what color your underwear is.”She replies, “okay, meet me after class and we’ll settle it.”But before class ends, she goes to the restroom and removes her panties. After class is over and the students clear out, Johnny makes his guess.“Blue.”“Nope. You got it wrong,” she says as. There was something about making it impossible to penetrate a security barrier that was an incredible challenge and one at which she was very good. Quietly, she answered, “I don’t know.”The couple talked for a while before Ed said, “You said that you wanted to play when you came here. Did you have anything special in mind?”Tilting her head, Ling answered, “Anything except sex.”Puzzled, Ed asked, “Why no sex?”“I’m competing tomorrow and it isn’t good to have sex a day before a competition.” Ling was signed up for a statewide martial arts competition. With all of her spare time, she had started working out and getting back into fighting prime. Once in shape, she resumed her training.“Tomorrow is Sunday,” said Ed.With an irritated look, Ling said, “The men’s prelims are today and the final matches for the men are in the afternoon tomorrow. They put the women on in the morning before the final matches because we seem to draw an early crowd. It seems there are a lot of people that like to.
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