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" Why haven't you visited?" asked the desk clerk."Actually, I did visit once, many years ago, but an embarrassing thing happened and since then I've been too ashamed to return."The clerk consoled him. "Sir, while I don't have your life experience, one thing I have learned is that often what seems embarrassing to me isn't even remembered by others. I bet that's true of your incident too."Dr. Epstein replied, "Son, I doubt that's the case with my incident." Was it a long time ago?" Yes, many years."The clerk asked, "Was it before or after the Epstein Fart?"MRS. COHEN AND MRS. MURPHYMrs. Murphy and Mrs. Cohen had been long time close friends. But, being old-fashioned, each went to a retirement home of her own respective religion. It was not long before Mrs. Murphy felt lonesome forMrs. Cohen, so one day she asked to be driven to the Jewish Home to visit her old friend. When she arrived she was greeted with open arms, hugs, and kisses.Mrs. Murphy said, "Don't be holdin' back, Mrs.Cohen,. You shall be required to service anyone and everyone at the behest and command of your owner, whether orally or anally.“All of your assets shall be transferred to your children, minus inheritance taxes. You shall no longer require any such wealth, as you shall be remain, naked or clothed at the discretion of your owner, at the side of your owner, to attend upon their every need whenever they shall desire it. Your owner shall be whichever member of my harem shall seek this opportunity first and openly claim it from my hand. You shall be fed, bathed, clothed, and sheltered, as noted. No basic bodily needs shall be deprived. Furthermore, your actual lifestyle and standard of living shall be little changed in terms of creature comforts, only your freedom and your manhood denied you.“Even so, this is the extent of your punishment, and when you die, you will not enter Purgatory, but will simply be annihilated. That will be your final, eternal fate. The only way that this would not be the.
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