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Other times the ride was smoother and the destination more promising, but it was never his own choice. This powerlessness reminded him of his youth for many different reasons. The idea of freedom is one that is challenged in our younger days. The socialisation processes of our pre adult days are like lessons for our future, when we truly are free. Free to choose what to do or to choose what not to. For Satre, freedom was not in what happened to us, but rather in how we should respond to it. And we consciously and un, make choices, in our everyday performances in our roles as ourselves, Erving Goffman might add. Everything before adulthood, seems rather constraining by comparison but is a necessary learning process before getting your licence and taking the wheel for yourself. Jerome was frequents told what to do and what not to do, growing up, usually because of his commitment to rule breaking. It excited him for complex yet simple reasons; - Jerome enjoyed the thrill of getting away. He kept his swelling cock pressed against my vulva while he put his hands on my breasts and massaged them, rolling the nipples between his fingers. His wet hair lay cold on my shoulders. I looked into his face above mine, studying every line and feature, and put my fingertips to his cheeks. I wanted to remember him, I knew that he was going to remain with me in my dreams no matter what, but I tried to encompass him with my eyes and hands while I still had him. His long jaw, his sloped nose, his red beard, the creases around his heavy-lidded eyes, the wide, grim, sensual line of his mouth. All of him–I listed every mark and scar and freckle, the bulky curves of his muscles, the litany of dark images that sleeved his massive arms. Everything about him seemed made for me as I seemed made for him. I longed for his touch, he was an astonishing bedmate, I knew he had fallen in love with me. And both of us knew that it was impossible. He had his fate and his burden and I had mine. All we.
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