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I lay on my back and I stare wide-eyed trying to cleaver the darkness, trying to part the way until the dawn. I can’t sleep, mustn’t sleep. If I sleep she’ll call me. And I’m afraid to see her… can’t face her now… What could I say? How would I explain… I work my tongue across secretion-crusted lips acrid from smoke and beer. Does she know I’m smoking now? Does she know I’m drinking again? Is she watching? She stifles a nervous laugh but I don’t look… there will be no sparkling eyes, no soft parted lips waiting to be kissed, no warm embrace… no forgiveness… ‘You shouldn’t be smoking. You promised. Why are you drinking? You promised me.’ Yes I promised… Don’t we all make promises, promises that we believe are forever before the night comes and swallows them whole. Promises that were freely given, no price tag, no doubt, easy to give when the future beckons… What good is the promise that echoes in an empty room? Words that shatter like glass on the floor and lay there unheard unseen. Maria made it home at 6:15, and by then Rachael had made a quick dinner.Sloppy Joe's, to Bobby's delight, made with buns that Maria had boughtat the bakery and brought home with her.Bobby was reading his library books, and Maria and Rachael were startingto pack in their respective rooms when the doorbell rang. Bobby ran andgot it, then ran back to report that "a man was here to see Rachael."Both women came down.It was Mr. Maclean, the church deacon. Maria invited him in. Heimmediately noticed all the boxes piled up. "You are moving?" he said."Yes, we will be moving down the street in a short time. There is a newowner of the house, and we can't afford the rent." Do you know what the new rent is?" the deacon asked."Probably $800 a month. That is more than twice what we were paying,"Maria said."That is actually fairly reasonable for a house. I wonder if you couldgive me the name of the owner. The church has just hired a young pastorto take over until Rev. McNaughton is well enough to.
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