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”“I definitely don’t want to die,” Charlie said.Titus asked, “What was the most exciting thing that has happened to you in the past year?”“I almost got a speeding ticket. I drove right by a policeman. Luckily he must have looking the other way,” Charlie answered.Titus asked, “How fast were you going?”“I was doing sixty eight in a sixty five mile per hour zone,” Charlie answered.“That’s really pushing it,” Titus said.Charlie said, “What can I say? I’m a law abiding citizen.”Titus pulled out a large envelope and rummaged through his desk drawer. He pulled out a couple of brochures, papers, and business cards. He stuffed them into the envelope before handing it to Charlie. With a smile on his face, he said, “There you go.”“What’s this?” Charlie asked.“That’s the solution to your problem,” Titus said.Charlie asked, “What is it?”“Inside that envelope you will find brochures for summer camps for your two kids. You’ll want to ship them off while you are having the adventure of a lifetime.. . ?" Yes Justin is there something else I can do for you?"Suddenly I was unaccountably nervous. "Well it's been a while since I... That is I need to... and I don't want to..." My voice trailed off.The gleam in Lois Mortenson's eye told me that she knew exactly what I wanted. "Oh I think I can help." She looked down to where my groin was hidden by the bed sheet and the unseen pyjama pants I was still wearing. "Normally this is a job for one of the nurses," she smiled as she reached in and patted my penis, but I think that on this occasion that it might be fun if I took the opportunity to help you out. I mean--" the smile turned to a laugh "--you can't be in there alone, and I imagine that this could be considered part of your therapy." She looked at me still smiling. "Do I assume that you don't want to use the bedpan?"I looked at the doctor. "Absolutely not. I mean it's my arm that's broken not my leg. I just have a sprained ankle." I tried sitting up, and with doctor Lois's help.
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